Dear Mom and Dad

Photo by Nicole Pierick

Dear Mom and Dad,

Remember in the summer when I was counting down the days until I was headed off to school? Or every time we got in a disagreement I told you I was an adult and to let me make my own choices? How about when I would come home late and you’d tell me I was past my curfew? When I would argue with my sister about taking my clothes? When I complained about being tired from work? Yeah well, we are a little over a month into school and I’m about to say it — I’m homesick.

Of course I am still loving this place; it’s my home most of the year. I love my friends and team. But they aren’t you. I mean, making my own eye doctor appointments AND paying the bill? That’s not the “adulting” I pictured or wanted. In the summer, I wanted to stay out late with my friends, but now that I am at school, getting home before 10 p.m. is rare.

I used to argue with my sister about taking my clothes, but at least then I knew where they were — now my friends just take off with them. That cute sundress of mine? Gone forever. And work. Wow, I miss work. My coworkers are great and updating my closet every week is something I took for granted.

Not only that, but I would go to sleep and wake up refreshed, ready to take on the next day. Now, I go to sleep and wake up still tired from the previous day. Don’t even get me started on weights, meetings, practice and individuals. These are all things I forgot I would have on my plate back here at school.

The thing that drove me nuts the most growing up was how protective you guys were. I didn’t realize it really was for my own good until I moved here. You used to tell me that nothing good happened after midnight and that’s why I needed to be home early. I used to hate when you guys would say one of my friends or the boy I liked wasn’t a good one. I would always yell, “Let me be an adult and make my own decisions!” But time after time, you were right. I honestly can’t think of a time you were wrong.

I never understood some of these things until I moved here. You always had my best interests in mind and I took that for granted. It is hard to come back to my apartment, to make my own choices, own meals, clean the whole place and figure out how to “adult” in general. There are things I want to do but know I shouldn’t. I wish there were times I could use the excuse, “My mom said no.” But I can’t do that here.

As I have matured over my time here, I have realized how much you really do for me. I shouldn’t have said, “Let me make my own adult decisions” so much because a small part of me wishes you would still make choices for me.

I don’t mean to sound all bad because I couldn’t imagine my life any other way. I guess what I am trying to say here is, I’m sorry and thank you. I’m sorry that I took everything for granted at home this summer. The meals, the freedom, the advice, the arguing, the good, the bad, the ugly — I miss it, all of it.

I know I don’t say it enough, but thank you for everything that you do for me, even when I am not the best kid ever. Just know, if I start to call home more often, it’s because I miss you and everything back at home. I’m doing great here, loving every minute I get to spend on the field and with my friends. Maybe not so much of the whole homework and class thing, but I signed up for it, after all. Even though I push you away sometimes, I’ll always need a mom and dad like you in my life.

Love,

Your Homesick, Bratty College Student